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Life can be so cruel
Given what’s been going off for you in your life, I’m not at all surprised you haven’t been around. I can’t imagine what you both are going through, it must be tortcher. My thoughts are with you.

As far as the campaign goes, there have been a few workshops in the last month or so. These are to discuss and brainstorm what is wanted from the public consultation, which is due to start in 2009. I will be updating the forum, as soon as I have the ok on the info

Sorry I have not been around - but my thoughts are still with you all.

I have not been around as at the same time as the campaign to save the Henderson started my husband of over 20 years became very ill, he was in and out of hospital, was in fear of death and no one knew what was wrong .

At the same time I was very unwell too and while not as bad as him I felt terrible and could not find a reason for my illness either?

It turns out that my life has had yet another twist as my husband who was a seaman for over 27 years had unknown to me - or him - picked up HIV on his travels and now had AIDs and given it to me too! see my blog if you are interested: http://hiv-and-us.blogspot.com/

Ironic really ...............
That after the Henderson my life was completely turned around, I have never touched drugs or been promiscuous from the day I left the Henderson to this, or had any self destruct behavior or lifestyle.
Perhaps you can be too complacent??

I also trained as a youth worker and teacher, worked in this for over 30 years and other caring initiatives and married a man that has never had a moments mental health or other life problems and was as stable and OK in this way as you could ever hope to be.................

And lived for so long in what was for me a completely different and stable world

Then just as the Henderson campaign took off, and at 55 years old - I had this new bomb shell!!!!

That my faithful and wonderful husband had been unfaithful briefly several years before and acquired HIV and now had AIDs and had passed it to me.

I guess some peoples lives are just never meant to be easy?? well mine wasn't

If you are on facebook my profile can be found here: http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=622132941&ref=profile#/profile.php?id=622132941&ref=profile

I hope to follow this group more in future and hope you will understand why I have not been around
But will be more now

Veritee XX

That's no problem at all, sorry to be short here but I'm off to work for the night

Sorry about dribbling on about my Henderson stay on your forum Karl
Just trying to organise and process my thoughts and memories for the Oral History presentation and document it before I forget it again.

I do not expect any replies- just hope no one minds that's all?

Breakfast and lunch was supplied by the kitchen with residents on a rota to make toast, butter bread, heat up extra limited ingredients supplied, such as tinned beans and tinned tomatoes, etc serve and wash up.

The two meals were delivered in the usual heated hospital trolley, not plated up, but in big stainless containers of food that the breakfast and lunch rota had to serve up and then wash up.

Everyone ate this food. All staff that were on duty at the time it was served including the then ‘director’ Stuart Whiteley and deputy Ken Nutall and the 'chief nurse', who stood in line with the rest of us on most days to get a plate of food.
However the staff rarely if at all helped prepare or serve it!! Sometimes the younger placement students would help if we were running behind but certainly not the director etc and any 'higher up' staff.

When I was there I thought of everything in the Henderson being so equal, staff and residents, and that we worked together according to our skills and knowledge, and all contributed to every task in the place. But looking back I can see that this was not entirely true - the staff generally did not do any cleaning either not even of public rooms.

So it just seemed like this for me as someone used to a despotic father, institutional life or a life on the streets or in squats whereby I was the lowest of the low with no equality at all. So for me then the fact the staff ate with us and spoke to us in groups and outside of groups as people, was just amazing - but perhaps not as equal as I thought then?

But it would be too idealistic and impractical to really think that it would be.

Sorry if this 'chief nurse' reads this - unlikey but just in case - but I have forgotten your name, and can not really remember you proper title. Yet I do remember you well as you were very helpful and kind to me. The fact I have forgotten your name is not a product of who I am now, as women and my relationships with women now are generally more important than those with men – except with my lovely husband of course.

But at the time I was very male authority orientated – in that it was men in authority or power over me that I wanted to be approved of by and who I remembered. My memory has always been bad since I had Deep Sleep Treatment a few years before and especially at that time.

So now I only remember the names ‘Stuart Whiteley and Ken Nutall’ I do not even remember the names of most of the residents I was there with even though they were important to me or any of the other staff even though I met one male staff after I left the Henderson socially, I do not even remember his name now!

I do remember 'Alan' a resident I had a relationship with who visited my family with me and our relationship continued a little after he left the Henderson before I did and he went to a Farm Theraputic Community - I think in Godalming, Surrey ( I wish I could remember its name) as I visited him there on my motorbike after I he left.
If you are out there somewhere Alan , I hope you are doing OK and - thanks - you will know what I mean!

Might have been this one: http://www.strugglingteens.com/archives/1993/2/np05.html but if so as it now only takes children it must have changed its age group, as Alan was in his 20s

Back to cooking

The evening meal was different as we were only given the ingredients and we were on rotas to cook the ingredients for all the residents and the staff on evening duty.

This gave us a bit more lea-way to be creative and I like to cook. I have passed this on as my daughter is a trained chef who loves cooking and has worked in restaurants since she was 15 and is going on a degree in this area next year.

I also did the veg garden that year so when I could I incorporated the home grown garden veg into the evening meal when I was on the rota.

The funniest situation I remember was that while normally we would get ordinary ingredients – but often quite basic i.e even unplucked chickens on a few occasions that we had to prepare.

But one evening – I think it was over a weekend - when I was on the cooking rota the ingredients consisted of carrots, potatoes and turnip and two recently killed rabbits with their entire coat on and shot in them!!

Yes I know that this sounds unbelievable now – but I am not making it up or misremembering it – this really did happen.

I do not know why we got these rabbits for our tea – I was very compliant at the time and I certainly did not think to ask!! Maybe they came from a well wisher!

But that is what we had.

Luckily I was on rota with a man who was used to cooking on a budget – things like entire rabbits were not actually as unusual as they would be now to have as an ingredient for a meal, my family in the 60s and 70s often ate things like this – but it was just unusual for the Henderson.

So we set about skinning them and making rabbit stew!!

Of course it took a lot longer than a usual meal might and the community did not eat until very late.
But it was such and achievement – as we managed it!
There was fur and skin everywhere and of course we had to do a separate vegetarian stew too.
But it tasted OK and while there was some shot in the stew it was on the whole a success.

But if anyone there at the time could enlighten me as to why we had un-skinned rabbits supplied for tea – I would be truly grateful!